Scolding your child is an inevitable part of raising them. However, when adults continue to use negative words when scolding, children lose their self-confidence.
In this article, we will cover the adverse effects of using negative words when scolding and give some tips on how adults can scold without using these words.
Many parents end up using negative language when scolding their child.
Some parents use phrases like “you can’t do ……” or “why can’t you ……”.
And when children act out in public many parents say things like “I won’t take you here anymore”, “I am going to leave you here”, “I hate kids that do things like that”.
As a parent, we scold our child because we want them to learn how to act appropriately.
However, no one feels good when they are bombarded with negative language. Most adults have experienced being called negative things by others and were damaged internally. Children feel the same way.
Being bombarded with negative language on a daily basis causes people to feel bad about themselves and feel that whatever they do is not good enough.
This causes us to lose self-confidence and feel negatively about ourselves. So, let’s be careful about us using too much negative language in our speech.
When you feel like you have something negative to say, take a step back and a deep breath.
Then think about how you can make your thoughts more positive it will help you cool down.
For example, you can change “don’t do that” to “let’s do this instead”.
You can change “don’t speak so loudly” to “let’s use a quiet voice”.
If you want to say “you need to clean-up”, you can instead say “let’s clean-up” or “have you finished cleaning up?”.
Using these phrases instead will have a positive effect on your child.
It is also a good idea to praise your child with phrases like “good job” or “I like …. who is good at ….”.
In our busy lives where we do not have the extra time to think about what we say; many parents end up using negative language to scold their child.
However, using this type of language on a regular basis can really hurt your child. When scolding your child, please try to avoid using negative language and protect their feelings about themselves.
Attending mommy and me and drop-off classes is also an effective way to improve your child’s self-confidence and feelings about him/herself.
When they are able to perform a task during the class, they feel good about themselves and it is also a good opportunity to receive praise from their parents.